Planning an International Trip with Kids, How Do I Make This Happen?

So we've touched upon the mental preparation of choosing to travel internationally with kids, sharing some ways in which travel has a positive impact on young minds, and now we are ready to dive into the nuts and bolts of planning. This is one of my favorite parts!

As an A-type personality, researching and making lists turns me into a giddy child, and that's what this next step in our international travel planning process is all about. Are you ready to figure out where to go, how to find transportation and accommodation, and figure out what you'll do when you get there? Here's step two!

Planning an International Trip with Kids, Three Part Series

Take the Leap!   |   How Do I Make This Happen?   |   Don't Pack the Kitchen Sink

Planning an International Trip with Kids, Take the Leap

For those who have never traveled internationally with their children, the thought alone can be sweat-inducing. Some days, it seems like you can hardly manage a grocery store trip without losing every last shred of dignity and sanity, let alone dragging them across borders and into cultures, languages, and landscapes completely foreign to you.

But as the mama of three kids under the age of four, I'm here to tell you that it can be done. You can not only survive traveling internationally with your kids, but you can thrive! And they will, too.

What follows is part one of three steps on how I encourage others to travel internationally with their kids and walk through our methods for preparing mentally, deciding upon the destination, and packing light but smart.

Planning an International Trip with Kids, Three Part Series

Take the Leap!   |   How Do I Make This Happen?   |   Don't Pack the Kitchen Sink

Beaching with Babies

I rarely went to the beach as a child.

My mother disliked sand, and with six children, an excursion to the beach more closely resembled an invasion of enemy territory than a joyful, memory-making opportunity. Because of that, as soon as I became mobile (read: drivers license + car), I made beaching my job whenever I wasn't actually, you know, at my job. Day trips, weekend trips, corn hole on the sand, day-drinking, wave jumping, body surfing, driving on the beach in a jacked up pick-up truck, raising the Jolly Roger high to the croons of Jimmy Buffett - these are all essential parts of the American beach experience!

Finding Nemo at the Virginia Aquarium & Marine Life Center

So we found Nemo at the Virginia Aquarium & Marine Life Center, and that's all that mattered to our Nemo-obsessed toddler.

Even before the trip began, I had high expectations... and reservations. The aquarium admission price for an adult is by no means cheap, and after factoring in the other costs (Airbnb rental, food, gas), my thrifty side nearly scrapped the whole trip. But wanderlust prevailed, as did the toddler's increasingly-cute obsession with sea turtles and marine life.

Applying for a Child's Passport

So you've got a kid and you want to travel. What next?

Applying for a passport in the United States is relatively straightforward, albeit not inexpensive, whether you're an adult or if you're a parent looking to acquire one for your little bundle (or toddler tornado) of joy. I've broken the process down into three steps, found below.

Time Flies When You're Having Babies

Written Christmas Eve 2017

I blinked, and my entire life changed.

Today we are celebrating the second birthday of our oldest daughter, Toddler Gypsy. It has been such a joy to view life through her eyes! A simple trip to the grocery store turns into a game; an excursion to a historic site becomes an adventure; a camping trip may as well be a visit to another world. She has a big imagination and loves to go to new places, just like her parents.

Return of the Prodigal Blogger

Hello, there!

It's been a long time since I've lurked in these parts. Nearly seven months to be exact, but who's counting?

How Having a Baby Improved My Travel Experience

Did you do a double-take when you read the title of this post?

Most people would assume that having children would diminish the travel experience, and if you read some of my tongue-in-cheek posts about flying with babies and how we survived a total of 19 hours on a plane with an 8 month old, you would think I'd be among that crowd.

I didn't say traveling with a baby is easier. But I do think it's better.

Life, The Universe & Everything

In a world of oversharing, Danny and I have decided to err on the side of caution when it comes to privacy. Sure, we share details about our travel experiences, which oftentimes get personal, but we tend to be mum on our lives outside of that and practice especial care in regards to our little gypsies. Both here on the blog and on our social media, we have a strict no photo policy of our children. You may see a bit of cheek, the back of the head, or cute little toes, but you will not be seeing their faces. While this decision garnered a few teasing comments from family and a few eye rolls from those who didn't fully agree with us, we've been very careful not to share our daughter's name or photo online, no matter how innocuous or well-meaning our intent!

But it's been a while since I've given a general update on our family, how having an energetic one year old (and another on the way!) impacts our travel plans and travel style, or sharing how we split our budget between exposing our little gypsies to the world and ensuring that they get to enjoy the highlights of their own culture and country when we're at home. In other words, it's time to get a little personal!

Baby Gypsy #2
This past week we had a small party for Baby Gypsy #2 (hmmm, I might need to redevelop pseudonyms now that we're having more than one kid!), and our cupcakes revealed that we are expecting another daughter! Even more importantly, the ultrasound showed that she is developing quite normally, healthily, and energetically as she has plenty of energy to make herself felt through tiny kicks and punches. Seeing her little face on the ultrasound was yet another reminder as to how miraculous a gift life is and that even the unborn can make you fall in love with their personality!

Baby Gypsy #1
Sometimes I think that we have the Energizer Bunny for a daughter - she never stops moving! So far I've gained very little weight this pregnancy (a blessed relief after gaining so much last time), and I could undoubtedly attribute most of that to the thousands of calories burned chasing a toddler around the universe. Ever since she learned to walk at 10 months old, she has hardly paused since. She particularly loves being outdoors, whether visiting her daddy at the downtown mall in Charlottesville, trotting around Pilot Mountain in North Carolina, or chasing her puppy on her grandparents' hobby farm. Taking her to Germany seems like such a distant memory, and I dearly wish we could put firm plans in place for our return. She would be so much more fun now at this age, although the plane ride would probably be even more of a handful.

Absolutely fascinated by goats. She likes to "woof" at them.

Budgeting for Travel
Buying a house, having a "hungry hippo" toddler, and throwing the impending arrival of another little girl into the mix can make the budget do back-flips if you're not careful! We still make saving for travel a priority in the midst of life's everyday expenses. We managed to take a long, low-key weekend getaway to Mount Airy, North Carolina, for Danny's birthday (I tend to gift him trips away instead of things), and I still squirrel money away for our next, as-yet-unplanned-and-unbooked return trip to Europe. We've spent the last two World Cup finals in Germany, so we're looking to make it a tradition with a visit in July 2018. Sneak peeks at the general cost of flights in July and realizing how expensive 3-4 plane tickets will be nearly gave me a heart attack, but it'll be so worth it.

On top of that, I've dedicated $10 a week for a Girls Getaway... in 2023. You may laugh at that far-off date, but I'm completely serious! While we are all busy having babies and raising little ones right now, a few of us are hoping to take a (by then) much needed ladies-only trip somewhere. Maybe the Caribbean. Maybe Croatia. Maybe Spain! In saving $10 a week, by 2023, I'll have $3,120. Not a bad chunk of change!

***

Recently, we booked my mother in law's round-trip tickets from Washington D.C. to Frankfurt for a total of $605 - a very, very good price for mid-May (thank you, IcelandAir!). That familiar rush of finding a good deal and dreaming about beloved places abroad has left me feeling a little sad that we likely won't be venturing beyond our state's borders much this year, let alone the country.

Thankfully, that sadness only lasts until I see a picture of my daughter's face and then I start making plans to take her someplace new a little closer to home. Having kids is hard. Traveling with kids is hard. But I wouldn't change my life for the world. Unless you happen to have a spare million laying around to share!

What's new in your corner of the universe?

***

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Flying With A Baby: Tips, Tricks & Hot Toddies

Flying with a baby isn't easy. But it's not impossible.

Becoming a parent doesn't mean that you stop being who you are and stop doing what you love. Yes, finances change with having children. Yes, interests and lifestyles will change, too. But if you make travel a priority and budget accordingly, it's still possible - even if you have to spend more time prepping and jump through more hoops to accomplish it!

So if you're a wanderlustin' mama like me and looking for some practical tips on preparing for a transatlantic flight with an infant, read on. And for those blessedly kid-free readers of mine (no, I don't envy you one bit... okay, maybe sometimes), read on for some tongue-in-cheek entertainment, a preview of your potential future, or maybe just a little chuckle at the expense of all us mamas and papas wanting to take our babies all over the world. Just show us some grace - or buy us a beer - when you see us struggling with all the baby gear in transit!

Read More: Our Transatlantic Flight with an 8 Month Old

Not pictured: Patience & a bottle of rum

1. Pack Your Patience
You can forget the carefree days of traveling sans infant: cute outfit, a neck pillow, a good book, and the enjoyment of the on-board entertainment. Pack your big girl panties because things are going to get real. Like, trying to figure out how to change a blow-out diaper in an airplane bathroom kind of real. Be mentally prepared for the most stressful experience of your life. Expect something to spill at the most inopportune time. Resign yourself to the fact that your daughter will fall asleep on you just in time for you to need to use the bathroom. Like I said, flying with a baby is not easy. But your reaction to the stressful situation can make or break it and influence the reaction of your fellow passengers.

And if it doesn't turn out as bad as you feared, well, then party like it's going out of style! Which for us parents usually means a hot toddy at the end of a long day.

Tip: For shorter flights, try to arrange the flight times to occur around or during baby's nap times. Be prepared for annoyed looks from some passengers. They obviously have never, ever been a crying baby even once in their life, and never, ever gave their mother a single moment of annoyance or stress. (Insert massive eye roll.) ...Oh, and if you're a nursing mom and a bit shy about nursing in public (like me), you'll want to snag a window seat. I had a window seat in the back row, and it was perfect for privacy and comfort.


2. Make a Plan
Before I even drew up a packing list for our trip, I created a battle plan for getting to, through, and out of the airport. I'm not even joking (you can blame my A-type personality), but it did help me make sure that I purchased some much needed essentials and had a plan for what big ticket items (stroller, pack n play, etc) we brought versus borrowed at our destination.

• Arrive Early: Do not underestimate how much extra time you need. The extra baby gear, an unexpected dirty diaper, and a hundred thousand other things can eat up so much more time than you originally plan. For international flights, arrive at least 2.5 hours prior to your flight departure.
• Baby Carrier: I used a cheap Infantino carrier, but I would recommend investing in something more comfortable if you plan to wear baby consistently. This, however, worked just fine for in the airport and for up to an hour on various excursions. Wear baby while going through security, if allowed, and definitely wear the baby while boarding the plane - having your hands free as much as possible is essential!
• Carseat / Stroller: We have a Graco travel set in which the infant car seat latches directly onto the stroller, and we decided to gate check both items so that we could use them in the airport as we waited to board. We used the Gate Check Pro travel bags to make sure that our stroller and car seat didn't get overly dirty, and we were pleased with how the bags withstood the rough handling. No ripped seams or tearing. While it is not padded and will not guarantee that your items won't be broken, we were thankful that our baby's car seat was not dirtied as badly as our suitcase.
• Diaper Bag vs Back Pack: Maneuvering a plane with an infant is hard enough without having to balance a diaper bag on one shoulder. Even if only for the trip, consider using a backpack as a diaper bag. It was so much easier for me to have it strapped onto my back versus using a diaper bag with just the typical "purse strap" on it. 
• Entertainment: Babies, especially those older than two months, can get bored just like us. Make sure you pack favorite toys and books. Debut a new item on each leg of the trip to pique their interest.
• Friends: Be extra nice to the stewardesses; they can make your trip so much better! I cannot say enough great things about the on-board experience with IcelandAir. On two of our flights, they arranged for us to have the row to ourselves, and even on the full flights, they were always handy with extra pillows, blankets, and a comforting smile when baby was screaming her sleep-deprived little head off.
• Go Light on Packing: In years past, Danny and I would each have a huge roller suitcase with maybe a couple of backpacks on top of a camera bag and purse. We're more practical now that we have to balance all the cumbersome baby gear. We used one roller suitcase, one diaper bag, and one camera bag. That was it. I tried to use a capsule wardrobe approach for our clothes and generally feel that we were much more efficient with our packing on this trip than on any other.

These are now my "ABCs" of baby travel, but will remain a work in progress. My daughter was eight months old and already cruising around furniture in terms of mobility when we traveled, so you may need to tweak this list based on your child's age and development level.

Tip: Make sure your diaper bag contains an extra shirt for yourself and hubby in addition to spare outfit(s) for the baby. You never know when a bottle is going to end up all over you!

Gelato is a great end goal.

3. Remember the End Goal
The five stages of flying with a baby are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Oh, wait, those are the five stages of grief. Well, it's pretty much the same thing!

• Denial: It can't be but so bad. She'll fall asleep eventually. ...right?
• Anger: Why won't you stop screaming?!?! Do you think you're the only one on this plane? MAN! Why the heck did we think it would be FUN to fly to freaking EUROPE with a BABY!!!
• Bargaining: Honey... sweet pea... if you just stop crying and go to sleep, mommy will buy you the biggest, most expensive toy in the whole wide world as soon as we get there. I promise!
• Depression: I am never traveling anywhere again.
• Acceptance: Well, at least this'll all be over in just a few hours.

All good things come to an end. And so do bad things. So even if the worst case scenario pans out, just remember that you will reach your destination in just a few (long... very long) hours and be off that wretched plane with the last remaining shreds of your sanity and dignity. Then you'll be facing the next big adventure: sleeping with a jet-lagged baby.

Yay, parenthood!

Any other tips you'd like to offer?

***

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A Tale of Two Babies: A Transatlantic Gauntlet

"... it was the best of times, it was the worst of times."

So that might be a slightly dramatic way to sum up a transatlantic trip with a baby encompassing 8,656 miles, 27 total hours in the airport, 10 total hours in the car, one lost stroller, three new teeth, 17 sleepless nights, and countless liters of consumed hefeweizen to maintain sanity, but that's just how I roll, okay?

Seriously, though, I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Flying with a baby is not easy. But it's not impossible either, and with the right preparations, you can at least ensure that your marriage survives unscathed even if your eardrums don't.

Read More: Tips on traveling with a baby

To be fair, it actually wasn't as horrible as I expected. Granted, I had envisioned an inconsolable, wailing child for every single minute of the 19 hours in the air, but that only turned out to be true for about five of those hours. Okay, so maybe it was more like six (or seven?), but my therapist said I shouldn't keep focusing on the bad parts.

Baby Gypsy did extremely well on the flight from Washington D.C. to Reykjavik. No crying during the take-off (nor during the landing later). We had three seats to ourselves, and we managed to soothe her to sleep fairly quickly. I even dozed a little, too. As we landed in a sunny, but briskly cool Reykjavik airport, I even dared to think, Hey, flying with a baby isn't that bad after all.

You can see where this is going already. I obviously jinxed it.

As our flight from Reykjavik to Frankfurt was delayed by over an hour, the native grew increasingly restless. Increasingly sleepy. Increasingly angry. That flight will be forever ingrained in my memory as the nightmare flight. It was like our little Baby Jekyll turned into little Baby Hyde. She screamed for almost the entire four hour flight. Joking aside, I have never felt so ineffective or defeated as a mother than during that flight. There was nothing I could do for her, and to be honest, I kind of felt like screaming, too. I just wanted to get to our destination and pass out as soon as possible.

But alas, our transit woes did not cease upon touchdown at Frankfurt. IcelandAir had the best, most friendly, most understanding, and most attractive stewardesses and service on board the flight. I've never been so impressed by men and women taking such pride in their image and work.

The baggage handling side of things? Not so much.

We arrived in Frankfurt an hour later than the original itinerary, harried and scarred from our baby's screams (go figure, she was all smiles as soon as the plane landed), and waited around to grab our one checked suitcase, the stroller, and the car seat. We waited. And waited. And waited. Two hours later, we finally figured out that our stroller was not going to make an appearance. So we filed a claim and escaped the airport for the two hour drive home to Dinkelsbühl.

Never one to fail us, the Autobahn made sure to turn the two hour drive to nearly four. Thank you, baustelle. At least, it didn't cost us a missed flight this time.

Fast forward two and a half weeks and the return flights home to the United States were more of the same. More construction on the autobahn, causing us to reroute ourselves through back roads and discovering the scenic Castle Road route through Bavaria and Baden-Würrtemberg. More delays in the airport. More screaming baby time on the flight from Iceland to Washington, D.C.

But you know what?

It. Was. SO. Worth. It.

All that stress during transit was worth it for Baby Gypsy to meet her Great-Grandmother (Oma) for the first time. Worth it to meet Danny's sister Elke for the first time. Worth it to spend seventeen glorious days in a fairy-tale town surrounded by medieval walls, a river, and a moat. Worth it to see the world anew through the eyes of a little one who has so much more yet to see.

So while the thought of getting back on a plane with an infant may give me flashback anxiety for a wee bit longer, it's more than outweighed by all the great memories made.

Proof of fairy-tale town.

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Traveling With Baby - Don't Forget the Rum

Passport. Check.
Tickets. Check.
Suitcase. Check.
Baby. ...WHO FORGOT TO PACK THE BABY?!

So obviously that scenario hasn't happened (or else I'd be in jail for child neglect!), but the addition of a little one to a traveling family makes the packing list and to-do list grow exponentially.

Before Baby Gypsy was born, I had no real comprehension of just how big an impact one tiny person can have, particularly on outings. Forget the overnight stays, preparing for a trip to the grocery store can often feel like outlining a battle plan!

Williamsburg, Va.

Or so it seemed during the first three months of Baby Gypsy's life. Practice makes perfect, though, and with some regional traveling under our belts, we've grown more confident in our abilities to prepare and actually enjoy ourselves while out and about. It may take as twice as long and three times as many bags, but I love having our little third wheel along for the ride.

Nevertheless, traveling with a baby is certainly very different than traveling as a couple, and I have a few humorous insights for those of my readers who aren't card carrying members of the baby club.*

If you pull out a microscope, you can see the top of Dixie's head.

Pack ALL THE THINGS
Gone are the days when I could throw everything into a carry-on and travel the world. Ok, ok, so I've never actually traveled the world in one trip. And I only used a carry-on when the trip was less than a week... but you know what I mean! Our first overnight trip with Baby Gypsy to Jamestown and Yorktown (in the same stinkin' state!) resulted in a game of impromptu Tetris as we tried to finagle all our gear into one small Ford Focus. Dixie was relegated to a tiny 6 x 12 space behind the driver's seat on a weekend trip to the Northern Neck last month. And I mean 6 x 12 inches! Poor thing barely had room to breathe.

Each subsequent trip results in slightly less gear, but I have a feeling that I'll still end up over-packing for baby and under-packing for myself when we go to Germany later this summer!


GoogleMap Drive Time Estimates Can Kiss My Diaper-Swaddled Behind
Two hour drive to the Northern Neck? Make that three. Ten hour drive to New York? Yeah, we'll see you in time for Christmas. Babies get hungry often. And when babies get hungry, babies scream. And if babies scream, parents will do anything in their power to just make it stop!

I used to pride myself on my punctuality. Now I consider it a success to show up within an hour of my intended start time and bonus points if my socks actually match. If GoogleMaps wanted to irrevocably ingratiate themselves with parents worldwide, they'd add a feature showing drive time with an infant or kids. And it'd be even better if they could automatically recommend stopping points along the way. Bonus points if it's near a liquor store so mom and dad can get their double shots of scotch before hitting the highway again (I kid, I kid... don't drink and drive!).

In other words, getting to your destination can take quite a bit longer with a little one in tow!

I'm officially a bag & stroller lady. #SoFab

It's All About the Bags
Before Baby Gypsy, I was all about the handbags. Classic, cute, but functional was my bag of choice. Post Baby Gypsy, I'm not so much a handbag lady as I am just a straight up Bag Lady. You know the kind - cross body bag slung under the diaper bag over one shoulder with the Nikon DSLR camera bag over the other (had to upgrade the photography gear to capture every drool-dripping smile for posterity!), baby carrier hanging from one arm and pulling the suitcase with the other because HEAVEN HELP US IF I HAVE TO TAKE MORE THAN ONE TRIP FROM THE CAR TO THE HOTEL!

Cuteness is no longer factored into my purchasing criteria when shopping for a new bag. If it's stain-resistant, spit-up repelling, has a zillion super-functional pockets, separators, sorters, and features a built-in diaper changing caddy and deluxe bottle warmer holster, just take all my money right now and give me two of them.


Baby Soothing Should Be an Olympic Sport
I spent the entirety of our thirty minute tour of Thomas Jefferson's Monticello (a UNESCO World Heritage Site, by the way) bouncing, swaying, and humming Baby Gypsy into distraction. I vaguely remember a few snippets of our tour guide's informative spiel, but primarily remember all the moments I spent keeping baby girl's hands off the historic eighteenth century pieces of furniture and original walls to avoid any disapproving looks and wondering what in the world I'd do if she were to spit-up all over the original green canvas flooring. Probably melt into a puddle of embarrassment.

Slow travel is better than no travel, right?!

Less Is More and More Is Suicide
Once upon a time, I saw many of London's big highlights in just 48 hours. I did the same thing in Paris only last year. The very idea of trying to do the same thing with an infant now is just laughable. In a world where nursing mothers have an impossible time trying to find privacy to feed their child, I have to factor in extra time to trek to and from the car every two hours or seek out an inconspicuous corner of a tourist attraction or stand miserably in a bathroom stall trying not to think about how many germs are floating around while my baby is eating - on top of the actual time it takes to actually tour the attraction. If I can manage seeing one major attraction or two minor ones in a day, then I've won the #TravelWithBaby lottery.


But you know what? In spite of all these adjustments, I wouldn't change my life for the world. Baby Gypsy makes our travel moments all the more sweet.

And to all you other mamas and papas traveling with babies, I'd pour you a shot of rum, but I just finished the bottle. Cheers, my friend!

*Please note that the tone of this post has been inflated for sarcasm's sake because it's a way more humorous read that way. I hope I've not scared you off from having kids because it's seriously THE BEST thing that has ever happened to me. Ever. In fact I plan to punish reward myself with even more kids in the future! ;) 

Linking up with:
 Lauren, Van, Isabel, and Marcella.